Sweet Torture and Beautiful Misery
by VictorianWiccan
Summary: Abigail is brand new to the magic school, and sharing a dorm with a coldhearted Slytherin might not be how she wants to start off her year...unless she can defrost it.
1. Let Me Go

A/N: Ok, I have no idea where I get any of these ideas, but it seemed good at the time. Oh, well, I guess I should state that Ms. Rowling owns everything Harry Potter in story…lucky her. Well, I think I'll start my story now. Comment and enjoy. Oh and I might change some things as the story goes so if you're confused…stay confused…evil little me…

Oh, and her friends name is pronounced Jillian but spelled Gillian or in other words Jillybean/Gillybean…got it?

Sweet Torture and Beautiful Misery

By:

VictorianWiccan

She leans over the balcony, the warm summer night's breeze blowing through her silky brown hair. Black rivers of mascara cover her cheeks. She'd been crying again, the third time this week. This particular girl felt very lonely. No one understood her, they just passed her by, not holding her worth and fragility in mind; they were too caught up in their own petty worlds. In her high school, she feels worse, like the people walk through her; she doesn't exist.

_What if I jumped_, thought the girl, _would anyone notice?_ Those thoughts haunted her senses. Should she? Would it be worth the fall and loss of a future? With a deep sigh, she picked up her head and walked back in the serene silence of her empty room. Rain began to trickle down her window. She watches the lightning streak the sky for just a moment; that moment was all she needed. _Not tonight_, she thought to herself, _not now…_

The next day she woke up to a _crash_ in the kitchen. Pulling a bathrobe over her pajamas, she flew down the stairs to find her mother sprawled out on the kitchen tiles. "Mom, are you alright?"

"I'm fine!" At once she swatted away her daughters helping hand. "Get away from me, you little brat!"

"Mom, what's wrong?"

Her mother glared, full of hatred at her, "You made him leave! He left me!"

"I didn't even know that he had left, how could I have done it?"

"He hated you! You were a terrible servant and you didn't make enough money at that little gas station job of yours!" she shouted. Then she mumbled out of the corner of her mouth, "I should have sent you to that school when I had a chance."

The girl froze, "What did you say?"

"Nothing, shut up, and mind your business."

"No, you said 'send me to a school', what school?"

Her mother shot another glare at her, "You're a witch, Abigail! As am I and the whole line of my family. I was going to send you to a boarding school to teach you witchcraft, but I didn't think you deserved it. Now, I just want you OUT!"

"Y-you never t-told me?" she inquired in barely a whisper. Her eyes began to burn with tears again.

"Why should I have?" Her mother fumbled around in a drawer and pulled out a feather and ragged paper. "I wonder if Dumbledore will still take you in?"

"Who?"

"The headmaster at the school. New term is about to start and I can't bare to have you ruin my life any longer," she added casually and slapped her daughter on the cheek.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang. "I'll get it," said Abby, rushing to the front door. She opened it to a cheery faced girl.

"Abby! You'll NEVER guess! I got accepted to a witch school! All those séances, and I'm a real witch!"

"Abby couldn't believe her ears. Both of them witches? "What's the name of the school?" she asked finally getting her thoughts together.

The blonde haired girl looked at the top of an old parchment and read, "Salem Witch's Institute. Why?"

"I am going to a school too, for magic. But, it's called like Hoggart's or something."

"Hogwarts!"

"That's it. You know of it?"

"It's only the most famous wizarding school in the world! You're so lucky Abby."

"I guess, but I'll miss you SO much, Gillybean! You're my best friend, what am I going to do without you? No more séances, that's for sure."

The two girls spent the rest of the night reminiscing of their past encounters of witchery and prepared themselves for what lay ahead.

"Don't forget to write me ALL the time, OK? I love you and I'll see you when you get back!" Gilly left that night, throwing Abigail into a fit of loneliness that she knew would haunt her all the way through Hogwarts.

The next day followed, with the most peculiar things happening. When Abigail first woke up, there was a light pecking on her window. A tawny brown owl fluttered in as she opened it, a letter attached to its leg. Feeling apprehensive, she pulled it off carefully and unrolled the parchment that read:

_To Ms. Abigail Lucas,_

_You have been formally invited, although late as it is, to study at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry. It will be most difficult for you to catch up with the rest of the sixth years with whom you'll be attending classes with, but we know how extraordinary your mind is and your intelligence is most honorable. We will do all we can to help speed up the process. _

_A list of your required schoolbooks and supplies is on the second sheet of parchment you received. I hope you will be comfortable this year, as I know this will be very difficult. We will explain more upon your arrival. The Hogwarts express leaves King's Cross Station at 11:00 am exactly, so be on time._

_Signed,_

_Minerva McGonagall_

_Deputy Headmistress_

"Wow, looks like I need A LOT of preparation. Six years of magic in one year? No fun for Abby this year," she spoke to the mirror.

After packing her new belongings from Diagon Alley, which her mother flat out refused her to go and got them for her, Abby and her mother set out for King's Cross Station. "I'll send word if I have anything to complain about. Oh, and have a good term." With that last precious parting, Abby walked, amazingly through to Platform Nine and Three-Quarters. The gleaming red train on the other side smoked and children everywhere were saying goodbye to their parents. She stepped onto the train and immediately found an empty compartment._ This is going to be a long ride,_ she thought as the train began to move.

Abby shuffled through her large trunk and pulled out a spiral notebook and pen and began to write:

You love me But you don't know who I am I'm torn between this life I lead And where I stand You love me But you don't know who I am So let me go   
A/N: Oh, I forgot, I'm associating songs and song titles throughout the story…thought I'd mention that to you… 

The compartment door opened swiftly and a group stood in its threshold. The foremost boy with untidy black hair and glasses, spoke, "Do you mind if we join you? Everywhere else is full."

"Sure, it might be nice to have company," said Abby with a faint smile. She hadn't had very many friends before and this was all so overwhelming for her.

He smiled and filed into the cart with her, two other people tailing behind him, a tall, lanky boy with fiery red hair and a bushy brown haired girl, who was very pretty. But, again, the boy with the glasses spoke, only this time he was much closer and Abby could make out a thin lightening bolt shaped scar on her forehead. "This is Ron Weasley," he said pointed to the red-haired boy, "and Hermione Granger."

The girl with the bushy hair smiled and said "Hello." The boy with glasses spoke again, this time putting out his hand to shake, "I'm Harry Potter. You look much older than the other first years, what year are you in?"

"My name's Abigail, call me Abby, and I'm supposed to be in sixth year I think, but I'm new here, just starting."

"That's what year we're in!" said Ron excitedly; he hadn't taken his eyes off Abby since they were introduced. Indeed she was beautiful, but Abby thought nothing of herself as a looker, so she simply shrugged it off.

"I don't quite understand anything that's going on yet, but if there's basics, please feel free to help," Abigail injected desperately.

Harry laughed and said, "One thing, Hermione is the best in our year, and she's incredibly smart."

"Well, I hope you don't mind me inquiring your help this year."

Hermione chuckled slightly and responded, "It's not a problem, in fact, I'd be glad to help." She had looked down at her watch and turned to Ron, "We've got to go and make rounds. Talk to you later, Abby."

As Hermione and Ron parted, Abby told Harry to wake her before they reached the school because she needed sleep. She closed her eyes and drifted quickly into a vision of success. _Maybe this year won't be so bad after all,_ she thought as she shifted in her sleep.


	2. Forget It

**A/N:** I'm sorry that the first chapter was so boring, but I just had to get the storylines across on my main character. I promise the rest will be more exciting, especially since she finally meets Draco. Let me know what you think…

Sweet Torture and Beautiful Misery

By:

VictorianWiccan

Abby's eyes fluttered open, as she was being gently shaken awake. "Wake up, sleepyhead. We're almost at school and you still need to change," said Harry as she stared blankly into his sparkling green eyes.

Absentmindedly, she fumbled around with the things in her trunk and pulled out her black robes. Quickly, she threw them over her head and shoved her journal in one of the pocket; it seemed a perfect fit. She turned back to Harry, "What did I miss?"

"Nothing," Harry replied with a sigh.

"That wasn't very convincing. What happened?"

"It's over with, don't worry about it."

"OK, then," she replied raising her eyebrows.

Harry directed her off the train and in the direction of the first years. There she met an enormous man with a very bushy beard and hair. Finally, she crossed the lake in the boats with a few other first years, who stared at her with curiosity. "What?" she barked at them, finally getting fed up with their constant stare.

They reached their destination. A great black castle came into view; its million and one windows were subtly lit. She gasped at its beauty and took in everything in the surroundings of it. _If only Gillybean could see this_, she thought to herself with a smirk.

When they reached the castle, Abby looking around in awe, a professor by the name of McGonagall, which Abby recognized from the letter, had prompted them on what was to happen. "I expect the best behavior from all of you." With a flick of the wrist, which meant to follow her, they were led out into the Great Hall.

The Hall was filled with floating candles and four tables side by side, and another at the head where the teachers sat. Abby looked up at the ceiling and was awestruck at the star strewn sky that was shimmering above her. Suddenly, they all stopped. "The Sorting Ceremony is basically to figure out which house you would fit into the most. Your house will be like your family for the next seven years at this school. Rewards with points are given to those who do good deeds and rule breaking takes away points. You have been warned." She waved her wand and a four-legged stool appeared, on top of it was an old hat with a semblance of a face.

One by one she called out the names of the students around Abby. Each time the hat sprung to life and yelled out a house destination for them all. But, alas, it was bound to happen. "Miss Abigail Lucas!"

Abby sighed and her heart began to race. She sat down on the stool, the entire school looking straight at her. "Hm," said the atop her head, "you've had a very painful past, I see, particularly with your mother."

"Oh, joy, you're announcing my worst horror to the whole school. Enjoy yourself, please."

"The students were astonished at her sarcasm, some even sniggered a bit, but the Sorting Hat continued, "With your, uh, eventful past-"

"That's one way to describe it," she muttered. Again, the students laughed quietly.

"Yes, well, you've shown true bravery. Your intellect is better than anything I've ever seen. Your wit is astounding, as I've witnessed, and your friendships with these people I see in your head are your most treasured possessions. You have qualities that ft all four houses equally." At that notion the entire Hall erupted into whispers. "But, as your greatest and worst memories excel with such bravery, it's almost unbearable to watch these recollections. I see it fit to put you in…Gryffindor!"

The table under the red and gold banners exploded with cheers. Abby stood up and walked to the very back, a little secluded from the rest of the house. While the ceremony continued, Abby pulled out her journal and ripped out a sheet of paper and began to write a letter to Gilly. The letter stated:

_Gillybean,_

I have been here for almost five whole minutes and there's already a hundred rumors flying around about me. How much worse could it be?

The ceremony finally finished and Abby looked up from her letter. Dumbledore has risen from his seat, his arms open to embrace the whole school. "Welcome to another year at Hogwarts! I hope this year will be as good as those past. This year, however, will be a little different for those who are fifth year and above."

Everyone glanced around to one another curiously. The looked up again at Dumbledore who now had a large basin full of red smoke sitting in front of him. "This year, we will be creating a unity between competing and feuding houses. Mainly, Slytherins with Gryffindors, and Ravenclaws with Hufflepuffs. Each pair I pull from this basin will be living together for the rest of their remaining time at Hogwarts. One boy and one girl form each opposing house will have to put their differences aside to share a dorm together. They will not complain because the teachers and I will not hear about it and are fully willing to take points to those who think the basin's arrangements are wrong. Now, let's get to the Sorting shall we?"

The hall, once again, burst into whispers, this time confused and somewhat angry. The basin shook and rattled in the front of the hall, which silenced the bickering children at once. A slip of paper flew into the air and Dumbledore caught it gracefully. He read, "Hermione Granger, Gryffindor will be pairing with Blaise Zambini of Slytherin." Abby looked down the table at Hermione whose face had drained of all color.

The Sorting continued putting Cho Chang and Ernie McMillan together, Harry Potter and Pansy Parkinson together, and Ronald Weasly with Millicent Bulstrode. Finally, it happened. Dumbledore's face lit up when he read the next names aloud. "Ah, our newest and most anticipated student this year, Miss Abigail Lucas." Abby's heartbeat quickened. She hated being put on the spot. "You, Miss, will be sharing a dorm with one, Draco Malfoy, Slytherin."

Abby had no idea who Draco Malfoy was, but from the sound of the condolences she received, it wasn't good news. "Tough break, Abby," said Ron as he left. The hall began to empty quickly and Abby realized she had no idea where she was going. Quickly, she caught up to the Headmaster who gave her directions and a password.

She moved swiftly through the halls up to the highest tower where the picture that Dumbledore had described to her was located. There was a gallant man being knighted by a fair maiden, they crowd watching him. "The Accolade," Abby muttered, completely fascinated.

"Very good, dear," said the woman in the painting, "but, now can you tell me the password?"

Abby stumbled backward a bit and stared at the painting that was now speaking to her. "Uh, seduisante," she stuttered back to the woman with the sword. She nodded and the portrait swung forward, revealing a large living room type space. There was a large, roaring fire already going. She also noticed a small dining table with two chairs, one on either side, a rose in a vase in the center. "Hm, practical," she muttered to herself with an evil smile.

"About time you showed up." A head rose from the couch that sat across from the fire. He had white-blonde hair that was falling slightly into his captivating silver eyes.

He was very good looking, she noted, almost enough to make her forget to respond. "Well, aren't you just a regular prince charming?" she retorted, finally finding words.

His smirk was amazing, and she stared at him in awe. "I'm Draco Malfoy. _Sir_ Malfoy to you mudbloods."

Anger flushed her cheeks and she replied, "I don't know what a mudblood is, but I certainly will not hear it anymore. I'm Abigail, by the way."

"What happens if I say _mudblood_ again? What are you going to do?" he asked seemingly amused.

"It'll be the last thing you _ever_ say…Goodnight, _Draco_." With that last note, she walked up the spiral stairs to the dorm where she would sleep. Yet, she found no sleep in there at all. She walked out onto the balcony being reminded of home. _I miss Gilly so much. I wonder if she's having as much jolly fun as I'm having_, she thought rolling her eyes. When she toured around her room, she noticed that she would have to share a bathroom with Malfoy as connected both their rooms together.

Abby flopped down on her bed as she heard Malfoy stomp into his room. With a smirk, she pulled out a permanent marker and starting to write on her wall:

It's a crime 

_You let it happen to me_

_Out of mind_

_Forget it_

_Easy to please_

_Never mind, forget it_

_Just memories_

_On a page inside a spiral notebook_

_Just fade away_

_Please let me stay_

_Caught in your way_

_I could live forever here_

_How can I believe_

_When this cloud hangs over me_

_It's a part of me_

That I can never be… 

Finally, she added the last touch that consisted of a specially drawn hanged heart taken from the CD art of The Used. **A/N:** Sorry, I had to add that!

She heard a slight noise and looked up to see Malfoy staring at her from the threshold leading to the bathroom. "What are you doing?" he inquired.

She was about to tell him that it was none of his business but she bit her tongue and replied calmly, "I was getting ready for bed. Goodnight, Malfoy." He bid her goodnight without the slightest tinge of attitude and headed into his room for a dreamland all his own.

For the first time in almost twelve years, Abby had more than four hours of sleep that night. She dreamt about her future at Hogwarts. _It could be so much worse,_ she thought as she started to drift off to sleep.


	3. Short Stories with Tragic Endings

**A/N: **I'm bored out of my mind and some guy keeps signing on and offline a bizzlion times and I think I'm going to tear of his head if he doesn't stop. :sigh: Yeah I'm having a bad day…my brother just got out of rehab and I'm taking it the hardest. I love him, but he's so stupid! Anyway, I hope you can guess who sings the songs I use in each Chapter; they're easy enough. I'll give you a cookie if you get it right…

Sweet Torture and Beautiful Misery

By:

VictorianWiccan

The morning came quicker than Abby had expected. She yawned, rose from her bed and headed for the bathroom. Turning the knob, she opened it, noticing that she was looking straight at the back of Draco Malfoy.

They had both kept thinking about their first meeting together; they way they melted over each other's appearance. But that was only looks. There was so much more. After all, he was a judgmental prick, and she was a filthy Gryffindor.

Malfoy turned and just stared at her as his breath was caught in his throat. She looked beautiful, though she wore no make-up. He looked deep into her honey brown eyes and sighed slightly, trying to regain thoughts. She raised a thin eyebrow at him. He cleared his throat and spat bitterly, "You should think about knocking once in a while, although, it would've been a privilege for you to see my…lower regions."

She could not suppress a smile. "Privilege? More like a gag-fest if you ask me. Besides, we _share_ this bathroom. Now, I don't know what share means to you, but in my book it means I can use this bathroom whenever I want _without_ knocking. Did you get all that?" she asked seeing through his taken aback stare.

Malfoy gaped at her as she walked back into her room, her hips swinging side to side. "Gag-fest…"he muttered under his breath as he brushed his teeth.

Abby started to pick out clothes to wear for the rest of the day. Since classes didn't start for two days, they were free to wear anything they wanted. Turning up the volume on her CD player so that it was blaring loudly, she flipped through her clothes:

Did you ever look, did you ever see that one person 

And the subtle way that they that they do these things and it hurts so much

_So much like choking down the embers of a great blaze_

_It's that moment when your eyes seem to spread aspersions_

_And to scream confessions at the insipid sky parting clouds_

_You let this one person come down in most perfect moment_

_And it breaks my heart to know_

_The only reason you are here now is_

_A reminder of what I'll never have_

_I'll never have, I'll never-_

_Standing so close knowing that it kills me to breathe you in_

_Standing so close knowing that it kills me to breathe you in_

_But this table for one has become bearable_

_I now take comfort in this and for that I cherish you_

_Just say you would do that same for me_

_For as much as I love Autumn _

I'm giving myself to Ashes… 

Malfoy sat in the common room listening to the odd sounds of Abby's music. _This is strange_, he thought, _but also very good._

Finally, Abigail emerged from her room wearing ripped up jeans, a white almost see-through shirt with a black bra, which the shirt read "The Used", and black Vans. _She looks cute_, thought Draco. He mentally slapped himself for thinking such a repulsive thing. If his father ever read his mind…

"I was going to go and checkout Hogsmeade. Want to go with me? Hello?" she said waving a hand in front of his dreamy face.

Snapping out of his reverie, he replied, "Uh, sure. Let me change."

She waited and waited for about ten minutes before he finally emerged from his room fully dressed. _He looks good_, she said mentally to herself. Shaking the thought out of her head, she took in his outfit. Slightly tight, deep green shirt to show his muscle defined form, black baggy jeans, and black shoes. Not bad. "So, why did you ask me to come with you?" he asked as they departed from the common room and out the portrait.

"I don't really know anyone else. If you don't want to go I could always ask Harry-"

"Potter, forget him. Don't worry, we'll have fun."

"Well, I wasn't worried, but I certainly am now," she said sarcastically and looked up at him with a glint in her eyes.

Malfoy smiled, "Well, then I won't disappoint you. My friends always have fun when they're around me."

"Friends? Malfoy has friends? I would've never guessed," she said playfully, failing to keep a straight face.

Malfoy stopped in his tracks and put his hand over his heart, "Ouch! Cheap shot."

Abby giggled, "And many more to come." Draco's heart fluttered under his hand. Finally, they reached the Great Hall. Students were everywhere, but only fifth years and above could make a little visit to Hogsmeade before classes began. They walked in silence, throwing little glances at each other, hoping to catch one another's eye. They kept missing. Walking across the sloping lawns, Malfoy broke the silence, "So, do you have a boyfriend?"

Abigail was a little shocked at his forwardness, but answered honestly, "No, I don't. Why?"

Draco grinned stupidly and replied, "Just wondering, but, really? I mean…really?"

"Why is that such a shock?" she asked not making eye contact as if he thought something might be wrong with her.

"It's just…really?"

She rolled her eyes, "Please, just keep rubbing it in. I don't think I've gotten the message yet."

Malfoy blushed. For the first time in his life, a girl, other than his embarrassing mother, made him blush. He was captivated. "You're too pretty to be alone," he said almost inaudibly.

Abby, however, caught every word. She too turned a shade of pink. "Was that Malfoy's attempt to be nice?"

He laughed lightly, "I guess so."

"What makes you attempt a sorry on a- what was it you called me? A mudblood?"

Draco turned a deeper tinge of pink. "Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I didn't mean to say that."

"Don't apologize, it's how you felt. Besides, I still don't know what it means."

He tried to himself from turning a deeper shade of crimson, which he was sure she could see by now as it clashed terribly with his pale skin. "It means dirty blood," he muttered.

"Oh, well, then I shall thank you for such a lovely compliment. I hope to hell you don't call anyone else that."

They entered the gates of Hogsmeade. Abby was astounded at the site in front of her. Little shops of every desire lined the cobblestone streets. Small cafes could be seen full of students all of which were drinking the same butter colored drink.

"Want to go to the Three Broomsticks and have a drink?" asked Draco, snapping Abby out of her reverie.

"Can't we explore a little first?" she inquired with a playful pout.

Draco chuckled, "Of course. Let's go to the Shrieking Shack, shall we?" He held out his arms to point in the direction of this shack. They walked silently until, again, Draco could bear it no more. "How do you like it so far at Hogwarts?"

"Seeing as I've only seen The Great Hall, our dorms, and this place, I'd be hard to say. It is, however as little as I've seen, very beautiful. I can't wait to explore more of it."

"You know, I can show you a bunch of secret passage ways in the castle if you'd like. We might have fun with that," he said with a sly smirk.

"And I thought I was already scared of having fun with you; now I'm terrified!"

He gave her a soft shove and found his skin tingle at the contact. _What is wrong with me,_ he questioned himself. "Well, here's the Shrieking Shack. It's supposed to be the most-"

"The most haunted building in Britain. I'm not stupid. I've been studying witchcraft for years. Gilly and I vowed to come and see this some day. I can't believe she isn't here. I miss her so much," she said with a shiver to her voice though it wasn't anywhere near a cold season. Her eyes began to burn and swell and she looked around, careful that she wasn't to let any tears fall in front of Malfoy. "Uh, shall we go have a drink?"

As they walked back through the tiny village and into the doors of the Three Broomsticks, she took a seat at the very back booth while Draco ordered drinks. "Nice place, eh?"

She took her drink and looked interestedly at it, wondering what its contents were. "Cute, very cute. Intimate, I like that a lot. Uh, what is this?"

"Butterbeer. For 'studying witchcraft for years' you don't that much about everyday life, do you?"

She threw him a dirty look and defended herself. "We only did séances. At that time I didn't know that they really existed, though, I really wanted to believe it."

"We?" he asked confusedly.

"Gilly and myself."

His face relaxed from its confused state and inquired, "so, I'm guessing, though this is just a guess, that this 'Gilly' is your best friend?"

She smiled. "It was always Gilly, I, and Ben. Inseparable, we were."

"Ben?"

"He is my other best friend. He was never into the whole 'witchcraft' thing very much, but he did join one séance. That's how I got this," she said showing him the palms of her hands. Clearly seen were scars on each palm. "We shared blood. It's supposed to-"

"Spread diseases?"

"No, it's supposed to bring closer magical companionship. As a wizard your whole life, you should know that."

"Very funny," he said sipping his butterbeer. Their conversation for the rest of Hogsmeade consisted of school, teachers, and other normal things.

As they headed up to the common room after a long day, they bade each other goodnight and went their separate ways. Abby went to sleep that night without crying; something she'd never thought to accomplish. Malfoy did that for her. She smiled at the thought and drifted into dreamland.


End file.
